Maybe I am, and there's no way to check and find my birth certificate or high school yearbook to know for sure!! (But my older sister started going gray in her twenties and she would bury me ALIVE if she knew that!!)

[...] To be honest, my last two birthdays haven't been all that [...] great. So I would TRULY love a big ol' celebration for my last pre-fiftieth birthday!

If you need me to remind you of how much you've done with your life and how happy at LEAST a couple folks are that you're here no matter what age you are, I would be thrilled to provide that service. Mostly free of charge, even!